Being made a fool of | msrebel's Blog

I was out of my mind; I didn’t know the difference between reality and insanity. I was confused on who to trust and who not to trust. The concept of it all doesn’t come easily to me. I was missing days, and in and out of the hospital, not knowing whether or not I was coming or going. Then you came along and I knew I loved you right away. U accepted me for all that I was. I left because I was scared; to trust; to love; to be loved back; to feel secure in someone else for the first time. I know you don’t understand that, hopefully one day you will. So I ran, I left. Then the summer came and I got better. So I came back for you. It all felt right this time, like finally God has granted me permission to be happy for the first time in my life.

But then you said you were closed off to the idea of me. U were cold and unhappy. U were still hurt. I tried to fix it, to show you things were different but you told me that I wasn’t good enough. We had to be friends, so u could “figure” things out.

Then you told me of her; the one for which you grew feelings for. The one who you said you broke it off with but you’re still seeing. Still kissing…still deciding upon.  U told me today you couldn’t decide if it was her or me. That baffles me; I thought we were soul mates. Loving each other forever. Now you allow someone else to come inside and take that away. How could you. I feel like a fool.

A fool who thought love was brave enough to fix anything. I guess when all is said and done, I was wrong.